Finn went in for his 6-month check-up at the doctor yesterday…well…not by himself. His mama took him. I’ve been dreading this 6-month appointment because I knew what was coming after it. Finley’s circumcision was botched when he was a few days old. They told us that it would probably be okay, but I knew it wasn’t right.
Sorry Dr., but I’ve been looking at one that was properly circumcised for 27 years now…
At another check-up, they confirmed that something wasn’t right and that Finn would have to be re-circumcised. Something that made me extremely angry about this was the nurse telling us that this happens all the time. Really? Because it shouldn’t happen all the time. You’re working on a pretty sensitive area and I’d think that if you did it all the time, you should probably be pretty darn good at it by now. Ratzafratzin! They told us it would have to happen at 6 months. So here we are at six months and we now have to schedule him to be re-circumcised. This means he has to go under anesthesia. It’s scary, but I’m trusting that he’ll be no worse for the wear once this is over. Very frustrating as a parent though.
He’s my happy little buckaroo.
We share the same gray eyes.
He’s starting to make little buddies…
Just like his big sister…
He’s so content all the time.
And he’s just starting to get his feet under him.
He laughs and coos…
And scoots and rolls.
He gives me that look that says, You’re going to take care of me right?
And I let him know all the time that I am. But I did have to break the news to him that there was something rough ahead, even if he won’t feel a thing. Gulp.
P.S. - There would be more photos of his big sister in this post if she weren’t so dang fast. Most of them come out something like this:
Or when she does slow down, she makes faces like this all the time. Weirdo.
And although it stresses me out sometimes, this being a dad stuff really is a pretty good gig.































74 Comments
My nephew had to be re-circ’d too, but they waited until he was a year old, and I almost think if it has to be done again (which it shouldn’t, they should have gotten it right the first time, imo), it is better that they do it at 6 months rather than a year. Good luck to Finn, and to all of you!
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No one has told me that my son (turned one year in January) needs to be recircumcised, but I can tell it’s not ‘normal’. Poor little guy. I hope this surgery will take care of things for your little man. I totally agree with you - this should be a completely uncomplicated surgery that goes right EVERY time. Makes me rethink having it done in the first place for any more boys we may have.
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I Have two sons. Now 23 and 18. I would have been outraged and scared to have to go through this with either of them.
As a Christian woman, mom, I will pray for little Finn. Praying that all will go well for your whole family according to God’s Grace and blessings. I know it’s hard, but Stay Faithful!~Peace
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Raising hand. My first son had to be re-circ’d, too, but at one year. Not fun at the time, but in hindsight - a small blip. Tip: chose one of Children’s satellite locations for the surgery - it is much less traumatic/hectic/headach-y than the main campus.
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Aww. poor little man… I’ll be praying that it goes well. It makes me mad too that this is something that gets messed up. You are doing the right thing though.
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Poor little guy, better now than later.
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I just love your picts - yes - being a parent ROCKS! I have four little munchkins running arond here all the time and it is the best life I could imagine (well, maybe if I had a maid…) (and a gardener…)
I am shopping for a camera to give me better pictures than my blankety-blank point-n-shoot gives me. Any suggestions for this non-professional?
Thanks for your blog - I love reading it!
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He is so stinkin cute!!!
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Our first had to be recirc’d, but not because of a botched job the first time. It turned out that he had too much skin down there and it had all gotten stuck where it shouldn’t have. So on his 6 month birthday, he went under and not only did they recirc him, but they took extra skin off and stitched it back where it belonged. The stitches were horrible. But the urologist told us that our son would be a very happy teenager since we had it fixed. Everything turned out ok and he’s a happy 5 year old now. Good luck!
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I’m assuming my youngest son (now 24) won’t read this, as he doesn’t know anything about this…but…when he was born, my husband (now my ex) insisted that son not be circumcised. I have no idea why…oldest son is. Anyway, *I* decided, after months of dealing with a screaming baby while trying to clean the foreskin, that he would have to be circumcised. Also, to help this decision along, I took son to a urologist, who told me the foreskin was adhered to my son’s penis and so it had to be taken care of or disastrous results would occur when we was older.
So…at 18 months, he was circumcised. I hated having to do it, and was totally pissed at my husband for making the original decision against…but B. went through it just fine. The worst part (and I have to tell you this now, so you know–was the IV.
Getting that IV in his little arm was torture for him and it killed me to watch it. Once that was done, the rest wasn’t so bad. B. was awake a few hours after surgery and home later that day, albeit groggy. He was fine by the end of the week and the circumcision was successful.
So, I certainly know how you feel. Keep in mind, Finn won’t remember it in years to come.
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~Laura says:
February 8th, 2010 at 10:26 am
@Carol Alaniz,
Your pediatrician was negligent and you were ignorant about how to clean an intact penis. You don’t need to retract it, it is SUPPOSED to be fused to the head of the penis until he is an adolescent. You simply wipe like a finger… no wonder he was screaming. It’s so sad that our culture in the US is so ignorant of the natural penis that not even our pediatricians know what “normal” is. =(
~Laura
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leah says:
February 8th, 2010 at 2:02 pm
I agree with Laura. My mom had an attack when I didn’t circ my son (now 2.5) and tried to tell me I needed to retract it. NEVER EVER DO THAT. It’s like ripping off a fingernail. I actually smacked a nurse’s hand once for trying to it to my son.
Good luck with Finn’s surgery. For anyone reading this, if you are going to circ, I’ve heard getting a Rabbi to do it is best. Just a thought.
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Aww poor guy! I’m praying for him. At least he won’t remember it, right?! And I hear ya on the photos. The good news is they slow down in a couple of years.
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I’m glad to hear that anesthesia is going to be used… because… back in the day… um… poor baby boys!
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Oh, and one more thing to ponder - I have 3 boys (ages 6, 4, 2) and when our first was born my husband was always leary of hurting him in his “privates” with diaper changes, etc. But then I have watched how rough they are on their privates…and I’m convinced it’s not NEARLY as sensitive as you think. As a grown man, it’s hard not to think it hurts. But it doesn’t AS MUCH pre-adolescence. Ya know?
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Poor little guy. I can see why you’re angry! You’d think they would get it right the first time–every time. Those pictures are adorable, though!
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I’m sorry, that really really sucks. I know that in the long run it’s something you’ll barely remember when he’s older, but in the here and now you want to scream and hit someone. The last thing we ever want to do is put our kids in someone else’s hands- especially when the chance had already been taken and they got it wrong. Please let us know when his surgery will be so we can pray for him.
When my stepsons (now 20 & 18) were around 8 & 10 or so (or not, because I can’t remember a single thing), they had to be circumcised. They had never had it done when they were babies, and it was causing problems. They went through HELL. Especially the older one- the gauze would get stuck to the wound and the doctor would rip it off, etc. It would result in him puking from the pain. Clearly it wasn’t done right or bandaged correctly or whatever, but it was horrible. Oddly, when my son was born, I still opted to not get him circumcised, praying he won’t share the same fate of his brothers. Adolescent circumcision was something I would never wish on any boy!
Thankfully Finn won’t remember a thing, and I’m sure the younger they are, the less major it is. Not that that helps now, because I can only imagine how LITTLE you want this done.
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Poor little guy! I would be extremely angry too! Your pictures are amazing!
http://sprucehill.typepad.com/
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Amazing pics, and words..it’s like being there, you can feel it in the pit of your stomach. Nominating you again next year….
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Aww!! I would be mad too!!! Poor guy…my brother in law had to be re-circumsized and his mom says it wasn’t TOO bad, but it heals a little slower. I think he was a bit older though. Good luck and everything will go well because you guys are positive about it.
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HI
My friend’s sons both had to have this done at around the age of 6/7 YEARS! Its much worse then I promise… Just let him get as much air on the “area” afterwards!
Good luck x
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A little boy in my Awana class was just circumcised this week. He’s SIX. Ouch! I didn’t feel it was my place to ask why it was being done now, but maybe it was messed up before.
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Just curious, why circumcise in the first place? It seems to me that it is genital mutilation, and completely unnecessary regardless of religious beliefs. You wouldn’t want them to cut off some skin from your little girls genitals, why is it okay to cut some off of your little boys? I just don’t get it. I do hope that the fix goes well for him though. Poor thing.
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Crystal says:
February 3rd, 2010 at 12:21 pm
@Heather in MT, Heather, I am sure you mean well, but I really don’t think this is the time or place to have a circ debate.
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Kait says:
February 3rd, 2010 at 12:37 pm
@Heather in MT,
I am SO with you! It seems like a horrific thing to do to a baby and reading all the horror stories in these comments has confirmed that our decision to avoid circumcision.
That being said, I hope everything goes well with your son’s surgery but I think it’s horrible that he has to undergo such a gross surgery twice.
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Carol Alaniz says:
February 3rd, 2010 at 12:59 pm
@Kait, Though I said in my comment that I didn’t know why my ex didn’t want circumcision for our youngest son, the urologist I took my son to told me many people don’t want circumcision but then they change their minds when the foreskin begins to adhere to the penis. He told me even when parents are vigilant about keeping Vaseline on the forskin, it usually will adhere within the first year.
I tried and tried to keep Vaseline on the foreskin and also to clean it, but within six months, my son was screaming every time I cleaned him, as the foreskin had By a year old, he would grab his penis to keep me from cleaning it. I had to have him circumcised. Like Ryan and Alison have found, there’s often no choice. I hope you find that things go better for your son–but please don’t think that it’s ‘horrible’. It is a minor surgery that is done for health reasons and has been done for a long time. Doctors who don’t know what they’re doing are generally causing re-circumcisions.
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Carol Alaniz says:
February 3rd, 2010 at 1:01 pm
@Kait, Sorry, in the comment I dropped some words: meant to say ‘every time I cleaned him, as the foreskin had adhered.’
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Tony says:
February 3rd, 2010 at 1:15 pm
It was said above that this isn’t the place to debate circumcision. Fair enough, since it’s the blog owner’s rules. While it will be clear that I have a very strong opinion on one side, the information below is correcting factual errors above.
@Carol Alaniz,
The information that urologist gave you is wrong. The foreskin naturally adheres to the penis at birth. It’s not supposed to be retracted until it separates naturally. (Forcibly retracting the foreskin prematurely can cause problems for intact men.) This natural separation will usually occur at a young age (i.e. 4-5) but may not happen until late teens. The only time to worry is when it’s causing problems, such as an inability to pass urine. Otherwise, it’s normal and shouldn’t be forced.
Penile adhesions often occur after circumcision because the remnant of the inner foreskin is still moist mucous membrane. Problems from this, such as skin bridges, are a common cause for needing “re-circumcision”. Preventing this is likely what Crystal describes in a comment elsewhere about “popping” it loose.
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Carol Alaniz says:
February 3rd, 2010 at 1:37 pm
@Tony, I understand what you’re saying. I can’t debate whether the urologist I took my son to was a good doctor or a quack. At the time, I didn’t pursue a second opinion. I was given this info and thinking the info was in good faith, had my son circumcised. But I do know that at the time I could not clean my son’s penis at all, the foreskin would not move at all. Since this was 24 years ago, my memory about the exact conversation is a little fuzzy, but the urologist was concerned that the foreskin would not separate naturally later on. I do remember distinctly that he said he wanted to avoid my son having to have a procedure when he was a teenager. Based on all of this I elected to go forward with the surgery and I have no regrets.
Thank you for your explanation.
@Tony: This is not my debating circumcision, merely my (lame) attempt to explain to Kait that circumcision when needed, or elected, is not necessarily ‘horrible’. But I guess it’s just a matter of point of view.
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Heather in MT says:
February 3rd, 2010 at 7:42 pm
@Carol Alaniz,
Crystal, I wasn’t attempting a circumcision debate. I was asking for another persons opinion and perspective. Other readers have provided theirs and I have found them informative. As far as whether or not this is the time or place, I’m sure the owner of the blog can decide that and delete the comment if he so chooses.
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Crystal says:
February 4th, 2010 at 1:25 am
@Heather in MT, Sorry, it was your word choice that made me think you were trying to start a debate. I’ve seen so many posts about this subject that quickly turned to bashing on either side and it makes me sad. I understand not everyone does it and everyone has their reasons.
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Kait says:
February 4th, 2010 at 9:27 am
@Carol Alaniz,
What you’re talking about is a mandatory surgery for health purposes. I don’t think there is anything wrong with a mandatory surgery.
But cutting the skin off your child’s genitals without a medical reason is horrific. Circumcision immediately after birth is a cultural norm NOT a medical necessity. There are lots of men the whole world over that never have surgery on their penis and their penis is just fine.
Our decision was based on this - our doctor told us that circumcision as a newborn is rarely medically necessary and we firmly believe that God gave us perfectly created babies. We wouldn’t hack off their finger or their toe just because cleaning it isn’t the most convenient thing in the world. Why would we remove part of our perfect baby boy’s penis?!
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TheDan says:
February 4th, 2010 at 1:58 pm
@Kait,
Unlike all of you I actually own a penis and I am pro-circumcision. I think my most horrific memory that I have about being circumcised is, well, hmmmm, come to think of it I don’t remember being circumcised. I’m fairly positive it was done though.
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That’s part of the reason we decided to skip it for our son. That, and we decided he should look like his daddy. I hope it goes smoothly this time. Finn will be in my prayers.
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I have tons of pictures of my 3 1/2 year old that look just like the blurred one.
Best of luck with Finn. I had to bring my daugther for a procedure when she was about a year old and for me the hardest part was watching her be put under (iin MN you can go in with them so they don’t get scared and then you are with them when they wake up).
Be prepared for him to be extra irratable for the next couple of days after; not only from the procedure he’s getting (honestly, I don’t think I know any guy who wouldn’t be crabby after THAT procedure!) but because of the anesthesia as well.
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I keep hearing more and more botched circs…My son’s healed funny, but the doctor just kept “popping” it loose so it wouldn’t heal like that and it broke my heart. I couldn’t imagine having to do it all over a again. Praying for Finn to have a quick and painless recovery.
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Poor, poooooooooor baby!! Think I would’ve slugged the nurse for that comment… seriously, it happens all the time?!?! Horrors!!
Your babies are bee-yoo-tee-ful
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Better now at 6 months than when he’s THREE years old like my son was. It was awful. I’ll be praying for little Finn.
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It really would be okay to never “fix” it. He can keep it that way until he’s old enough to decide for himself if he likes having some foreskin left or wants to have it lopped off. Your doc doesn’t have the whole or the only story. I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this.
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Good luck, little Finn! Be brave for your parents, too, since they will be a mess during this procedure, as I am sure I would be if it were my little guy. Sending good healing vibes to you all.
We decided not to circumcise our son, now 18 months, and really have not looked back. I am European and really have never even heard of anyone, not Jewish, being circumcised until I came to the States some 20 year ago. We had two girls first and did not have to think about it, but when we found out the third baby was a boy, the question came up. I did not want to alter out son in any way not medically necessary and my darling American husband agreed. Growing up, I have never heard of anyone having issues with an uncircumcised boy or man, for that matter. I find it a fascinating issue, but I admit to being totally bewildered by it, as well.
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I haven’t read through all the commments, so forgive me if I am repeating. I am so glad that I live in Europe where circumcision is unheard of unless it’s for religious reasons. Even then, the child must be 2 years old so that he can go under for the procedure. Sadly, American doctors are ignorant about men who are uncircumcized. I have three kids and two are boys. My boys are intact. I don’t do anything to their foreskin. I leave it alone. It doesn’t EVER need to be pulled back or cleaned underneath. It’s stuck to the penis for a reason….to protect it from bacteria and fecal matter. It will separate by itself in time. I understand that it is the right of the parent to decide whether or not to have his son’s foreskin removed, however, I believe if parents were equipped with accurate information, there would be lots more American boys with foreskins!
Ryan, I will pray that Finn undergoes this procedure with a minimum of pain and recovers quickly. I am so sorry he has to have this done at all. I am sure it is breaking your heart to have to put him through it again. You’re a great dad, and I enjoy reading your blog.
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Ratzafratzin! You crack me up. I love those grey eyes, so rare.
I think I might need to have your daughters tights. Is 30 to old for those?
Prayers for the Finns wenis. That is frustrating and saying it happens all the time… was that supposed to make it better?
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I know this is frustrating to you, but my son went through circumcision at 20 months. It was delayed because he was born with a heart defect and anesthesia or the trauma of doing it without could have killed him. He had open heart surgery at five months old. So things could be worse for you…
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This happened to both of my brother in law’s sons. They both did fine with it, but after that with my son, I can’t imagine having to do it again. But my sister-in-law said that Jack did just fine with it and Cole did just fine with it too… Still though, that is not something that should routinely go awry.
http://notthecroshaws.blogspot.com/2007/11/jacks-little-surgery.html
http://notthecroshaws.blogspot.com/2009/03/coles-update.html
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Awww…so sorry Finn has to have this surgery. Again! Your children are beautiful, beautiful!
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you’re an awesome parent Ryan, everything will be OK. It will- I can feel it.
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and PS it’s OK to feel angry you’re aloud.
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Prayers for Finn and family! My cousin had his first circumcision in his teens! Finn’s lucky he won’t have to wait that long; hopefully, he won’t remember any pain.
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Yep being a dad is a pretty good gig
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I’ll be prayin. And you’ll be wondering why you stressed so when he’s older.
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That is a huge stinker. So sorry! I don’t know what else to say except he’s in Good Hands.
And he couldn’t be any cuter…he looks like the perfect little man. As perfect as any human being could be.
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Yikes, that sucks. I have 2 little guys and I very vivedly remember their circumcisions and am so very very thankful that nothing went wrong. I can’t imagine having to put them through that again. I’m due with baby #3 in a couple months here and I have to be honest that one of my reasons for wanting a girl this time is because I just don’t want to do that whole circumsizing thing again. I’ll be praying for Finn and that everything goes great this time!
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Poor Finn! Luckily he has some pretty cool parents (and big sis) who love him dearly!
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He is getting so big - what a cutie! Big sis just keeps getting prettier! Follow your gut when it comes to doctors!
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Strangest thing about there being lots of messed up circumcisions nowadays- after Abraham ’twas done for centuries by rabbis and a good sharp blade and some wine -
he’ll be fine and only you will have the mental scars - well you and your beautiful Allison. He is a charming lil dude and has quite the special big sis.
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Oh no! Poor Finn! I have to be honest, I’ve never heard of someone having to have it redone. I have a 23 month old, Liam, and I cannot imagine how upset you are! I would have FREAKED if he had to have his circumcision redone. I’ll say a prayer for Finn, and for all of you. Good luck!
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Being a parent is so wonderful except for those harrowing times when your baby/child has to have a ‘little’ surgery. My son had a urological problem around age three. We had to let him put his own medicine on himself - so he had some control afterwards. The IVs are the worst but the giggle juice makes you laugh with him before he goes back. And yes we asked for some of that juice every time, seems all the parents do, but never received any.
Bless Finn, he’s young enough to not remember. And it’s quite all right to cry along with him as it’s more tramatic for you.
I have a few of those weird faces and blurred pictures too. Gotta love them.
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poor finn… that’s bad what they did…
but, I’ll say a prayer for him to be tough..
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I have 2 boys. My oldest is 6 and his circumcision was done with a scalpel and it turned out perfect. My son who is 2 had his with that plastic ring and his was not as good…
I think interview the doc and go for the one that just uses a scalpel. I have heard of the ones with the plastic ring (Plastibell) sometimes not turning out as well cause the darn ring slips sometimes leaving extra skin.
Just my .02
On the bright side, I am a nurse and watched circumcision and think I would rather have my son asleep for the job. They strap them down, no anesthesia and the poor baby screams bloody murder and typically pees during the process. I cried.
Praying for your little man. He’s really beautiful. You and Allison make gorgeous kids.
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It is amazing how ofter it happens. My son had his down in the hospital but it just didn’t heal properly. Now that he is 14 it looks fine and honestly he has no idea. Better to have it taken care of now while he is still young enough to forget about it. My uncle was in his sixties when he had to have it done and it hurt like hell.
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We are scheduled to have our son tomorrow and this is all kind of scary! I guess it wasn’t the best post to read before having a boy!!
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It is horrible that Finn has to go through this, but we had to wait for circumcision until my son was 8 mo (for medical reasons). I have also heard that there are a lot of botched circs. When my son was born a nurse in the hospital recommended to us (unofficially) to take him to a urologist to have it done. He came out of it fine. The only thing I didn’t expect was that when a baby comes out of anesthesia they can have a hard time. My son cried a LOT. I thought it was from pain and a nurse friend told me that sometimes this happens. It isn’t pain but the affects of anesthesia on them.
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Good Luck to Finn!! Good luck to you & Momma too!! It will be harder on the 2 of you than it will be on Finn.
I LOOOVE that look your daughter gives. It’s a devilish little grin…looks like you might have your hands full with her! Good thing Finn is laid back!!!
LOL
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Just wanted to write and say we had the EXACT same issue with my son. Dr said it would be fine once it healed, my husband and I both knew from the start this wasn’t so! At 6 months, he had his re-done. He came through fine, and it is right now, but man, what a stressful thing it was to endure, and yes, we were angry, too!
Hugs to Mr. Finn from the Flores family.
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Another reason my hypothetical son will not have this done. Aside from my own POV, how horrible! I would be livid as well! I hope all is well, your son looks like a trooper, so I’m sure he will be fine!
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Both of my boys had a partial natural circumcision (foreskin already partially attached - but in the wrong place) and chordee (crooked penis)and couldn’t be circ-ed at birth. #1 was circed at 7 months and had a caudal block (epidural-like anesthetic pocedure) and woke up happy -never cried in pain. Evan was circed at 6 months and didn’t have a caudal block because he had a little redness on his butt because he had pooped on the way but we didn’t realize it and it was like a 30 minute drive so he had red butt. They wouldn’t do the caudal block because they don’t want to insert needle in red area because of infection risk - woke up screaming. Screamed every time he peed for 1st 4 hours -then we got his meds right and kept up with them for the next 24 hours - no more crying after that. Keep the front of the diaper covered in vaseline or A&D ointment so ‘it’ doesn’t stick to the diaper. For both boys, they were oblivious to it after the first 4 hours. We did as our ped. urologist and nursing staff suggested and kept up with the pain meds for the first 24 hours even if he seems like he doesn’t need it. My youngest still has some curvature and will probably have to have another surgery (he’s one now) and it will be more difficult because he’s so much more active and vocal about everything. The sooner the better - feel free to email if you have questions. Be ready for the bill though…it was $450 for the circ in the hospital - its $8000 at Childrens’ hospital.
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Maybe…..
Dr’s who botch this kind of thing up.. should be required to go through the process again.. you know kinda like as a I’m sorry.
Finn to the Doc..” You go first ”
Just Saying…
: {
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You will be so happy you’re doing it now. The docs thought there was something wrong with our son’s too but with insurance and confusion we ended up putting it off until this last fall when he was 4 yrs. gosh it was pretty rough and we kept wishing over and over we had made it happen when he was still a baby. But, in the end, we made it and he’s fine- no emotional damage that we can detect and it looks just great down there!
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I can only imagine how worried you are, but better to do it now while he’s little than when he’s older. I used to take care of a 3 year old who was circumcised at 3! He was in so much pain and was totally aware of what had happened. At least you can love on Finn and give him lots of attention and he won’t remember it in the future.
Hang in there!
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That is why we didn’t have our son circumsized. I couldn’t bear the thought of someone screwing it up. I hope Finn does well, I’m sure he will.
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Oh man, I’m scared for life. Why did I read all of these comments about circumcision? I blame you Ryan Detzel?
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TheDan says:
February 4th, 2010 at 6:22 pm
@TheDan,
Ok that last sentence was supposed to have a ! and not a ? I’m not questioning rather or not to blame you I am exclaiming that I blame you.
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Hey man.. sorry to hear about your little guy.. That really stinks.
I remember when Gavin was little they had to cut the piece of skin that connects ur tongue to the bottom of your jaw. He had to much of it.. so they went “snip snip”
ugh.. I will never forget that day. But he was so young he never remembered… at least i hope he didnt..
hopefully things will go smoothly for Finn.. who I must say is a little Stud.
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Ryan. I am very sorry your son has to go through this. Perhaps have a different doctor do it this time? On a side note. Why do most Americans ignore that men in many other countries are not routinely circumcised? Men in Europe are not circumcised (unless they are Jews or Muslims), men In China, Korea and most Asian countries are not circumcised. And they live long, happy lives in the company of every body part they were born with. In modern days, with people washing themselves properly it is really no more necessary than ear piercing.
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As parents we never like to see our kids go through any pain, whether it’s physical, emotional or spiritual. But we can’t avoid it …for them, or for us. I’ve been through plenty of pain with my kids (all in their 20s)…in all those areas…it was VERY hard at times, but we grew, matured, and are different people because of the pain.
When my son had jaw surgery 2 years ago…at 20 years old, I cried when I saw his swollen face and him under anesthesia. I literally crawled in his hospital bed many times and held his grown man head in my lap, stroking his head while tears rolled down my cheeks.
We hurt for our kids, and with our kids.
Seems like there is a teaching message in that — how our God hurts when we are hurting….etc.
Hang in there Ryan and Allison….like one of the readers said above….it will be a “blip” on the radar before you know it.
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I am so sorry! Poor little guy, and I know you guys are in agony for him. At least there is anesthesia involved (though scary) and his pain will be helped. It makes me glad not to have circumcised my son, because mistakes do happen. I am sorry it happened to Finn.
If you don’t circumcise the next boy make sure you find a pediatrician who is educated on proper care, as there is a ton of misinformation out there. Dr. Fleiss is an expert you can find online. Praying for Finn and no more complications.
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Here is an article by Fleiss. Best of luck to Finn!
I agree you will better getting it fixed now versus later.
http://www.mothersagainstcirc.org/fleiss.html
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My heart goes out to Finn. But you know something my son is 35 and when we went in for his 6 week check-up, I like you felt that it didn’t look right, but as we’re setting there, the doctor takes a look at it, and just grabs it and says, oh this doesn’t look right, and then yanks!!! Of course the baby screamed and I just about dropped over, but it fixed it and he never had any more problems. Of course the dr never said oh by the way or gave me any warning, but I could have popped him right in the kisser! And I’m not a violent person. Hope everything is going well for Finn and Mom and Dad.
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Wow, you are a brave soul posting a blog about circumcision as it’s always a hot topic!! I don’t want to rub it in at all, as this is a parent’s personal choice. It was a hard decision for us. This was one of the reasons why we ultimately chose to leave Silas intact, fear of having to re-circumcise in the event that something went wrong. We didn’t have a choice with Torin or Levi as they both had Hypospadias, but we’re really happy that Silas didn’t have to go through anything like that. Torin has his surgery at 6 months, Levi at one year and it is SO HARD having to watch them go under and go through the recovery. I’m sorry that you and Allison have to experience it! Praying for little Finn..I’m sure he’ll be good as new in no time!
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Oh gosh. I would be a “tad” angry too. I was hesitant about someone cutting on our son when he was born in May. I couldn’t imagine having to let them do it a 2nd time. Best wishes to sweet Finn.
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I only have girls, but have always wondered why the OB who is a skilled surgeon doesn’t perform circumcisions and instead it is done by the pediatrician - is it that way everywhere? Good luck! He’s precious!
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Allison says:
February 6th, 2010 at 9:52 am
@Cindy, it was actually done in my OB’s office…go figure
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Ruth says:
February 7th, 2010 at 12:13 pm
@Allison,
and a way to give him something to do. I’d recommend that option to anyone, if only you can find a willing Mohel.
My first 3 sons were circumcised by my OB in the hospital which was law in that state.. and they were messy looking, not done well and didn’t heal smoothly. I always thought the Ped should do it - he’s the baby specialist after all… My 4th son was done by a Christian Jewish Mohel who also happens to be a physician. It was clean, appeared bloodless and noticeably less inflamed and, according to his Daddy (who watched and somewhat participated), his crying didn’t change between the outrage of being spread-eagled naked and the procedure itself. He had a specialized surgical stainless steel kit which was better than a scalpel for sure, it worked as a guide for each step. Also, Daddy’s job was to dip his finger in wine and drop it in the baby’s mouth… a slight anesthetic I guess!
I also slathered on plenty of Neosporin because it helps it to keep from re-attaching the wrong way and of course keeps the gauze and diaper from sticking; the pee from burning; the infection risk minimal…
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That picture of Finn in the knit cap is too cute.
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Ok, first off, your kids are adorable! Secondly, my nephew had to have a re-circ when he was around a year. (Speaking as a nurse)-Sometimes little boys have small irregular areas around the penis that makes circumcision difficult when they are newborn. A few months to grow makes all the difference-and sadly there is usually not a great way to tell if they will need re-circ’d until you get into the procedure itself. Thirdly-speaking as a nurse again- in response to one of the anti-circumcision comments, the foreskin DOES need to be pulled back and the head of the penis needs to be cleaned. Daily. And then the foreskin needs to be put back in place. If this does not happen, the foreskin will shrink and the tip will start closing and growing back together. I have seen 70 and 80 year old men have to be circ’d because things have grown together from lack of proper care. Just as most little boys would go weeks without a bath if left on their own, so will many older men (when left alone). Sad, but true.
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Cindy says:
February 6th, 2010 at 9:00 am
@Jodi J., Speaking as a mom to two intact boys and wife to an intact husband, yes, the foreskin does need to be pulled back and cleaned underneath *once it has separated from the glans and shaft* which normally doesn’t happen until puberty. To do so any earlier would be like ripping your fingernails off (similar to what a baby feels when he is circumcised without any pain meds).
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Sam says:
February 6th, 2010 at 9:50 am
You are correct! That is why a pediatrician who KNOWS proper care of an intact boy is so important! There are so many docs and nurses who are misinformed and think it needs to be pulled back. NEVER let anyone pull back your boys’ foreskin! It makes me cringe. I guard my son’s penis like crazy when we must go to a doctor for check ups. I don’t know why people are so misguided and ill informed.
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Jodi J. says:
February 6th, 2010 at 7:10 pm
@Cindy, You are correct in speaking that it is after puberty that the foreskin needs to be pulled back and cleaned daily and I should have clarified myself. Thanks.
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Stressful! One of our sons had to start having repeat procedures(not for the same procedure as yours) from about 6 months on that required anesthesia. Since he was still nursing at the time, he did not have to fast for as long as the doctor initially told me. The breast milk is digested quicker than other baby food so the possibility of having food in his stomach is low. You might check with your doctor.
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It’s incredible to me that you folks are talking about circumcision as if it were the most natural thing in the world to do to a child. And the ignorance regarding penile care is astonishing! No wonder so many intact American kids grow up with infections when so many parents and professional caregivers in the USA don’t even know that a child’s foreskin must never be pulled back in order to clean under it. Intact kids whose parents know how to take care of their boys’ penises don’t get infections.
People who torture and mutilate their own children should be in jail, not happily talking about their abuse as if it were normal and healthy. Hopefully, one day, blogs like this will be used as evidence in sexual abuse cases, because make no mistake - that’s what this discussion is all about.
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With my oldest they used something called a ‘plastibell’ and the results were not what I’d hoped, but no one ever said anything about redoing it. My youngest was done with a razor (or whatever the sharp instrument was) and it looks so much better.
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Thank you for your honesty…have been on Google looking up articles r/t circumcision. Our son is 20 months old we requested he be circumcised in the hospital before we went home. I too have always know it was not right; I spoke to the DR that delivered him and he actually was VERY defensive and said my son had a ’short shaft…shrugged and said it is luck of the draw’…((can anyone imagine?) our Pediatrician is wonderful assured me he would be fine and that his penis was of course normal…laughed at the Dr’s response (I have a great sense of humor but have a difficulty finding this situation funny). It was our choice we wanted it to look like a circumcised penis like his father…instead our pediatrician admits he was not generous with the amount of removal of the foreskin…thus the tip is mostly covered and when we pull back to clean he says ‘ow ow owie’ and quickly covers it. But b/c if the poor job if we don’t pull back to show the tip it is not clean…I’m annoyed every bath night. Is this similar to your situation. The thought of putting him through pain breaks my heart…yet it seems to bother him anyway?! Would appreciate more info: barbara.byers@carefusion.com Thanks!!!!! Sorry for the babble…your kids are so adorable!!!
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