I hate borrowing stuff.
My friend asked me if I had a gun at the house and I told him, “No sir I sure don’t.” He insisted that I must have one on the premises. I told him that I wasn’t sure and I didn’t have the cashola to buy one. He reached into his kitchen drawer, you know, the one where the utensils are supposed to be, and pulled out a Smith and Wesson .357 revolver. He placed it in my hands and said, “There you go, now you can’t say you don’t have a gun in the house.”
I looked at him with what I’m sure to be an excited gander. I told him that I couldn’t accept it and he shoved it back in my hands saying, “Don’t worry, I ain’t givin’ it to you. Just keep it while you need it and I’ll get it back later.” This is known in my world as a forced-borrow. Please don’t ever force me to borrow anything…something bad will happen.
Bear with me as I try to explain. I pulled into the driveway with my newly acquired, borrowed .357 on the seat next to me. As I got close to the house I noticed someone’s car parked by the garage…a church lady’s car. I needed to get this gun into the house and into a safe place. I didn’t want to walk in holding it and have to explain to everyone why I had this monster. Immediately a faint little flicker of an idea crossed my tiny mind.
I can shove it in my pants!
I thought to myself. So I stuck it in my pants. Just as I was about to reach the front door it opened before I could grab the handle. It was the church lady. She was on her way out and just had to give me a hug before she left.
She hugged me. She gave me a really strange look. She chuckled and she left. I just know she felt that gun in my pants and thought I was happy to see her. CRAP!! I hate this stupid gun already!
About 3 weeks ago I got a call from my friend asking for the gun back. I only see this guy once or twice a year and I was pretty surprised he actually wanted it back. I’d forgotten about it…I figured he would have too. So it took me until today to remember to bring it back to him. I went into the safe to get it and it had transformed into a rusty piece of worthlessness since last time I saw it. I panicked a little bit because I told him I would be bringing it by today. It was in horrible shape. You couldn’t even get the spinny-thing that holds the bullets to open.
I did not want to deliver this thing to my friend. What was he going to do? Ugh…isn’t that one of the worst feelings? So anyway I thought about it and my friend has always been a super gracious person and I’ve never imagine him hating me over this. So I dragged myself over to his house and I showed him the bad news. He looked at the rusted revolver as if his favorite puppy got hit by a car. I took the blame for the whole thing and tried to apologize as profusely as possible. All he said was, “Oh wow, that’s really a shame. Man, that’s a shame.”
I stayed with him for about an hour or so and we made small talk, but I don’t think he wanted to talk to me at all. I felt terrible and I kept hoping for him to let me off the hook, but he never did. On my way out I told him that I was really sorry for what happened to the gun and he didn’t say a word. I said that he needs to let me know how I can make it up to him or if I can buy him a new gun and he just kinda sat there and nodded. It was like I broke his little heart or something.
Now I feel like crap and I’m pretty sure he hates my stinking guts. I hate when there’s no resolve. I hate that stupid gun. I never wanted it in the first place and it caused nothing but trouble from the beginning.
Have I mentioned that I don’t like borrowing stuff from people?
Did you ever ask or mention that incident to the church lady? I’m curious to know what she was really thinking!
And people who own guns, like really own guns, look at them like they are lending you a 65 mustang Shelby. You took his Shelby and parked it outside with the window down all year long to be pooped on by birds and dinged with fallen sticks and leaves. (figuratively of course). I think he expected you to learn about it and take care of it and even go shooting with it. Hopefully you can repair your friendship!
Man, I hate it when people force you to borrow things too!
Cabin Fever in Vermont
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Love the phrase “forced borrow” and like you, hate it when someone does that to me. I hope it all works out.
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Wow – I feel your pain. Why do people force things on others?
My mom always to told me if I lent something out to not expect it back ever and if it did come back to not expect it to be in the same condition as when I lent it – if you’re willing to lend it then you should be willing to GIVE it. In a situation like this I think my mom’s theory would have benefited your friend
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When I was 19 and in college the Sony Walkman had just come out, and cost an outrageous sum of money, several hundred dollars. A guy I knew, not my boyfriend, not even a close friend, insisted that I take his brand new Walkman out while enjoying my pastime, roller skating.
Well, I fell. And really scratched up his brand new Walkman. Felt awful. And I could tell he was thinking “Crap. And I don’t even get laid for this.” I have never forgotten that, and have since then tried my best to avoid a forced borrow (love that term.)
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That’s awful. I’m still trying to figure out how it got all rusty inside a safe. But that’s beside the point.
Some time ago … i don’t remember how long, i made myself a rule about that stuff. I don’t do forced borrows anymore. Especially if it’s something i don’t want. I’ve ruined too many of other people’s things. And if my husband inadvertently accepts a forced borrow, i try to keep track and return his unwanted borrows asap. Things get ruined around here, and i would rather they were my things getting ruined.
I know some people look at me funny, but i still will tell them, ‘sorry. look, if it’s a gift that’s one thing, but i don’t borrow.’ I’d rather that awkward moment where we come to an understanding and they probably never try to lend me something again – than that horrible feeling of begging for forgiveness for ruining someone else’s belongings that you never wanted in your possession to begin with.
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My Dad always taught me that when you borrow something, forced or not, you return it in as good as or better condition than when you took it or you replace it…just saying.
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I’m with Beth. I hope you have learned your lesson to say NO. Perhaps he learned it as well that if a person truly doesn’t want something, don’t force it on them.
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My 8 year old would bring things home from school (book, pencil do dad whatever that kids trade, give etc) and I would always make him put it right back in his back pack and take it right back to the kid who gave it to him. He’d say “They gave it to me” and my response was “If you did not give him something of yours in return then you have to give it back” And I hate borrowing things which I why I don’t. Borrowed stuff breaks.
I hope the two of you were able to patch things up at some point over the years. And that you both learned a lesson.
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I’ve started telling people I NEVER return things. (Which tends to be true. Unless it is a library book. Then I return it late and consider the fine to be a tax I willingly pay to have the priviledge of a library.) Thankfully, they’ve stopped telling me I need to borrow things.
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The “spinny thing”? LOL
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i dreaded commenting, because i was afraid of reading the comments…lately it seems people get all up in arms (lol) over firearms in any context.
pity your friend assumed you’d know how to take care of it. he should have explained things, made sure you knew all the parts of it, how it all works, how to clean and oil it, etc. as much as i hate to say it, he earned that rust.
and i do hate to say it, because S&W makes fine, fine revolvers.
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You’re a sketch. I love the part about the church lady! Good stuff.
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